Remember ranking your best friends as a kid? “So-and-so is my 2nd best friend, but you’re my best, best friend.” Hopefully, now that you’ve grown up, you don’t rank your friends anymore. But most of us still have someone we’d consider a best friend. And learning how to be your own best friend is one of the best gifts you could ever give yourself.
I’m a sucker for a good romantic comedy. (Seriously, I tear up at the frickin’ Home Depot Olympics commercials for cryin’ out loud!)
It’s not just that I love Matthew McConaughey. (Though let’s be real: who doesn’t?)
But combine the transformative magic of love with the crazy-making power of frenemies, and you’ve got the ingredients for a great flick. And while romantic comedies don’t necessarily teach you how to be your own best friend, you can often learn a lot about how to be a friend (and how NOT to be a friend) to someone else.
Our favorite game was Candy Flash Flood. Out of nowhere, no matter what we were doing, one of us would yell, “Flash Flood!” And we’d race to the top of her bunk bed to escape the deluge of imaginary sweets. Then we’d have to “eat” our way back down to solid ground.
Faith and I lost touch after 6th grade. But I always imagine how cool it would be to still be best friends with someone who’s known me since I was 5.
We’d know each others’ secrets – every heartache, every triumph, every dream we’ve ever had.
We’d be each others’ cheerleader.
And we’d be brutally honest with each other – whether it’s a bit of chocolate on your face, a questionable haircut, or yes, those jeans really do make your butt look big.
We’d always tell it like it is, with a big dose of humor and love mixed in for good measure.
Every only of us has a life-long friend whose known us since birth: one person who’s been with us through thick and thin and never left our side no matter how crazy life got. That person is Yourself.
Now, if you’re like most women, you’ve probably been more like a frenemy than a best friend. Maybe you’ve been a fair weather friend. You know: there for yourself when things are going well but quick to beat yourself up for any failures or shortcomings. Or maybe you’ve flat-out been your own worst enemy.
Honestly, most women treat their friends way better than they treat themselves. We certainly talk to them more kindly that we talk to ourselves.
But there’s no better person to be your best friend than yourself. People will come and go in your life. And it’s not fair to expect another person to meet your emotional need for love and acceptance. Only you can give that gift to yourself.
And no matter what happens in life, for better or worse, you’re stuck with yourself.
World-renowned designer Diane Von Furstenberg once said, “You’re always with yourself, so you might as well enjoy the company.”
Seriously, if you treat yourself like garbage, how can you expect other people to treat you kindly? And if you constantly tear yourself down with destructive negative self-talk, how can you expect other people to say nice things to you?
If you want to boost your confidence and own your worth, you have to learn how to be your own best friend.
How to Be Your Own Best Friend in 5 Simple Steps:
- Be kind. Build yourself up and tell yourself what you appreciate about you. Tell yourself the truth in love.
- Tell your Inner Mean Girl to shut up and get out of the way. If you wouldn’t say something to another person, don’t say it to yourself.
- Give yourself unconditional acceptance. The good and the bad. The things you love and the things that drive you totally crazy cakes.
- Support and encourage yourself to go after your dreams.
- Extend grace to yourself when you screw up. You’re gonna make mistakes. Forgive yourself and move on.
Most of all, love yourself as only a best friend could. Because you owe yourself the gift of unconditional love. You deserve it, and you’re worth it.
Have you been your own best friend or your worst enemy? Comment below!
1 Response to "How to be Your Own Best Friend"
[…] video wash over you. Soak it in. And let’s stop shaming ourselves. Let’s learn to be our own best friend instead of our own worst enemy. And let’s start loving ourselves. And our bodies, just as […]