Finding Balance in Life Through Alignment

In my last post, I talked about how finding balance in life is often an impossible task, because we think about it the wrong way. How the reality is more like spinning plates, giving each role and responsibility the attention it needs in due time. How sometimes, the plates will all come crashing down, despite your best efforts. How that’s a part of Balance as well. Read the full post here.

In that post, I also hinted at a better way of finding balance in life.  Not as a static ratio or a necessity for happiness. Not as a formula to “have it all.” Rather, you can measure if your life is “in balance” by thinking about alignment.

A dear friend and colleague, Pamela Zimmer, wrote a beautiful post recently about her theme phrase for 2018: “Stretch in Alignment.” She describes how physical stretching is good for our bodies, stretching outside our comfort zone is good for us in business, and stretching to be your best You is good for your soul. But you have to stretch in alignment. In physical alignment, or you’ll pull a muscle. In business, she says, if you’re “striving (stretching) for a goal that is not in alignment with your purpose or mission, you’re basically wasting your time and any other resources you are throwing at it.”

That’s so true. And that’s exactly what I mean by finding balance in life. Measure your “Life Balance” not by whether things are equally weighted (because that’s not practical or advisable), or whether everything’s “working” (because sometimes they won’t be). Instead,  focus on this:

Finding balance in life through alignment with your Core Values.

Why are Core Values so important? Because they’re one of the Three Pillars of Self-Worth. Quite simply, when you live in accordance with your Core Values, you feel better about yourself because you’re living authentically. When you don’t live according to your Core Values, you feel like a fraud or a hypocrite. That erodes your self-esteem.

As you evaluate your activities and commitments in terms of your Core Values, you may be surprised at what you find. We often take on roles and responsibilities by default rather than by intention. You may also find some activities were once in alignment with your Core Values, but are now in conflict. It’s not because your Core Values changed. (Those are usually fairly constant.) But because life changed and your activities didn’t.

In those cases, carefully consider if you can remove those activities and commitments from your life. It may not be easy. But it’s necessary in you’re going to live in alignment with your core values. If you’re going to boost your self esteem. If you’re going to be true to You.

So when it comes to striving for that elusive and, frankly mythical, “Life Balance,” remember this:

To help you evaluate your priorities in terms of your Core Values, I created this resource just for you. The Life Alignment Assessment™: A Method for Living With Integrity and Self Esteem will help you evaluate your current activities. You can also use it as a decision-making tool when faced with the possibility of adding a new activity to your life.